Story listening
Why listening is the most underrated skill when it comes to successful storytelling for business.
“I want it now, in my mouth.”
I once said this when I was a little girl. I think I was just hungry. I’ve never lived it down.
I’m still that impatient person. I gallop through pages of books because I want to find out what happens next. I interrupt people mid-flow because I’m excited about the thoughts flying around in my head, and I get this urge to blurt out my views. I find corporate meetings intolerable - I just want to get to the nub, make some decisions, and get started on the action.
Where’s the protein?
This is why being a journalist suited me. It’s a highly demanding but also incredibly straightforward job. It’s all about finding the “protein”, to steal a phrase from Succession’s Logan Roy. There’s no time for chit-chat; I spent years hacking away at jargon-filled, fluffy press announcements and running around London going to press conferences where I had to grill CEOs.
I wasn’t the scariest of news reporters. If anything, I was a bit of an introvert. But I thrived on the pressure, and the few years I spent doing that job taught me so much.
And the most important lesson I learned as a reporter was to focus on the reader: my audience. I was working on the Daily Mail city desk at the time and whenever I felt nervous about doing an interview or untangling a company’s financial reports, I just thought about my readers.
My job was to ask difficult questions on their behalf. I had to make sense of the financial gobbledygook so that my readers could make decisions about which companies to invest in.
Once I got that notion clear in my head, the work became easier. It wasn’t about me - impatient me - it was about the reader. My purpose was to serve them.
The art of listening
A friend dropped me a line last month with a lovely writing conundrum. She explained she has a constant inner turmoil about how to reveal her “true voice” because she’s naturally quite a sweary person with a raucous sense of humour and a dirty mind.
She wanted to know how to let her personality shine whilst still being censored. I adore her, but I could see she was going to struggle to be truly honest, authentic and genuine without verging on the unprofessional. Especially as her kids read her posts.
I think this is a problem many people have, especially solopreneurs who are active on social media and rely on their personalities for business.
So what’s the answer?
1. Sounds obvious, but just listen to your customers. Think about your reader at all times. What’s in it for them? Do they need to be entertained by your hilarious take on life or would they rather learn something useful? Do you want them to think you’re a comedian and fun to work with, or do you want them to see you as an expert in your field? Both are equally valid reasons, but you have to be clear about your purpose. What’s the outcome you’re after?
2. Be creative with your words. There are many ways to reference things without being graphic. Remember the whole ‘say it without saying it’ trend? That’s the way I would tackle it. If your readers respond well to your black sense of humour, then go for it, but perhaps do it in a way that won’t make the children or potential clients cringe.
Be you, but the best you
Personally, I don’t think we all need to dance around on TikTok or create hilarious Reels in order to do our jobs. Unless that’s what your customers want - but you have to really question whether it is. Obviously, being you is important. People love to see the real human behind the brand. But sometimes, it’s a delicate balance. It’s about being you without being too you.
Distance yourself from the story a little, ask questions, get insights from other people and use that to fuel your writing. Just talking at people or talking into a void with no sense of purpose will get you nowhere.
So, whatever the copy - be it social media posts, a blog, or a newsletter - have your readers in mind constantly and ask yourself:
How old are these people?
Where do they live?
What do they care about?
What are they struggling with?
What keeps them up at night?
What do they want out of life?
How can you help them?
What does your product or service offer that might make their lives easier, more entertaining, or healthier?
Be inspired by others
I’m learning to listen more and to be more patient. There’s something really quite powerful about being the quiet one in a meeting or conversation. Just letting the other person talk. Asking questions. I’ve found the more I tap into other people’s lives, the more I try to put myself in their shoes, the better writer I become.
Professor Gary Klein spent years interviewing firefighters, pilots, nurses and soldiers about life-or-death decisions made under extreme pressure.
He looked for teachable moments: stories of how people deal with change and new information and turned this research into his seminal book about decision-making - Sources of Power. It’s a great example of how the simple act of listening can throw up meaningful results.
My client Anne Muhlethaler discussed this in one of her insightful blogs (which I have the pleasure of editing on a weekly basis). She writes:
“I discovered that when I let someone finish expressing themselves, really listening, my own response was often very different than the reactive thoughts that had come up earlier. I learned to pause in my communication. It's not that I was incapable of doing it beforehand but in a corporate environment, it had never been either a subject of discussion or a training one could get.” - Anne Muhlethaler
To illustrate her point, she found this great quote from Cheryl Strauss Einhorn’s Ted Talk:
“True mindfulness is not just about turning inward. It’s also about opening ourselves outward, to discover and collect the wisdom of others.” - Cheryl Strauss Einhorn
From pipdecks.com/listen - credit: G.Klein, Sources of Power
Don’t be a brand narcissist
Some businesses become so consumed by their own navel-gazing they forget their customers, and that is a huge turn-off.
Being a customer-focused brand will not only make people warm to you and boost engagement, but it will also help shape your communications and especially your tone of voice. Importantly, it will give you insights into when to adapt it.
For example, if you’re a consumer-facing brand, your homepage might be written in a witty and entertaining tone to draw people in. But your returns or delivery information section needs to get to the point quicker. The language needs to be simple and clear. I always refer to the copy on Gov.co.uk as an example of how to be brilliantly neutral.
Knowing what to write about and how to write about it is an intuitive process, but understanding who you’re writing for is the first and most crucial step.
So much has been written about developing tone of voice - if you’re interested in finding out more, here’s a reading list:
If you’d like any help developing your written brand voice, please do drop me a line. I’d love to hear from you.
